Friday, May 30, 2008

The Raging Battle

I noticed that over the past couple of weeks, my posting has been sporadic. I try to be honest on this little blog of mine and share what's going on in my life and how God's speaking to me. But sometimes my little inner struggles seem so petty, I don't want to bore people with them.

I took on a new ministry position at church: Children's Ministry Director. I did purely out of obedience to God. I'm glad I've followed His leading and I'm excited to see what will follow, but it's required more time and planning and prayer than I had imagined. As I've stepped into the role, I've grown in my passion for the kids of our church and community.

So, I've been busy strategizing for Children's Ministry and planning Vacation Bible School.

In addition to that, I've been praying for a teaching job in the fall. Hiring for schools usually begins in the spring, so I've spent plenty of time getting my licensure all in order, creating a great resume, and sending off applications and cover letters to a few jobs in the area. I know it's still too early to know for sure what will happen in the fall, but it seems like I won't have a full time job.

The whole work issue has been not only demanding of my time, but also emotionally draining. I want to work. I'm ready to be back in the classroom and to be doing what I love. But I also want to honor God and obey His leading. My family still needs to be a top priority. Since God knows me better than I know myself, I've asked Him to send me the right job. One that will utelize my gifts and talents and still allow me to be devoted to my family. So, even though I'm disappointed about some jobs that haven't worked out, I'm trusting in God's leading.

To add one more item to my agenda, I'm going to a writer's conference in less than a week. I'm excited to go and learn and meet people but I'm also really nervous. I'm not sure why, but I'm feeling totally insecure about it all. I think I'm going to be surrounded by a bunch of great writers which completely intimidates me. Besides, I would kind of like to have some great articles to bring with me and I haven't quite figured that part out yet.

In addition to my silly little stressors, disappointments and anxieties, I have been helping my husband prepare for a seminar on purity this weekend.

So, yesterday I was feeling a little overwhelmed and disconnected from God. I spent a little time visiting some bloggy friends and WHAMO! out of the blue, God spoke to me.

I read this post by a true prayer warrior, Lynn. And as I was reading it, God opened my eyes to see the arrows whizzing over my head.

It's no wonder I've been struggling this week. My family is on the front lines of a battle field. How could I have forgotten that?


Lynn said...

Wow Heather,

You are in the midst of the battle right along with the rest of us. I am not sure why so many of us are feeling the stinging arrows and feeling overwhelmed and defeated. But.....

Girl, join us in the prayer room and step aside and let our Jesus handle it all. He is all powerful, and I can't wait to see the enemy fall and our Lord receive the honor of rescuing his people.

Thank you Heather. Praying for you and your employment this week. Love and hugs, Lynn

Patty said...

What a wonderful and powerful post by Lynn. The battles are raging over a lot of God's children right now, especially in my extended family. I love how God led you to read Lynn's post and by you sharing that led me to read it and I am going to pass it on. Heather, the enemy thinks he has set you up but in fact it is the other way around. God has set you in a place to watch Him show off!!!
Thank you so much for sharing your heart today!!

Found said...

"On this rock I will build my church and the gates of hell will not prevail against her!" He is building HIS church. You are one of the pieces and one of the tools in His hand. He's using you to storm the gates of hell...YOU are in a battle, but He's doing all the fighting.

I'm with ya! May we just keep praying and obeying!


Susan said...

Hey Heather,

I read that awesome post when she wrote it... powerful!

Lord, I pray that Heather is doing much better. Replace her fears, concerns and insecurites with a new boldness, and a deeper confidence in the work you are doing through her life now. Let her feel your presence ever stronger during this season of warfare. In Jesus name, Amen

Kathy S. said...

Heather, my heart just went out to you in your challenges! As one who has struggled with inFEARiority... I have been encouraged much by this verse which I learned with my kids in past devotions with them: By the grace of God I am what I am. 1 Cor 15:10 (I like that it rhymes with the address, as usually I don't remember that with the verse:() It helps me remember that all are on different parts of the journey and that all are where they are by the grace of God. Remember Scribbling in the Sand. That was so helpful too!!

And the link to the blog with warring words was wonderful!! Rise up with zeal and boldness and push back the enemy in the mighty name of Jesus!!

Rest in Him,